Welcome To The World Of Investment Banking Hiring

My latest poem on what the world of Investment Banking hiring looks like. Here is the content:

Recruitment is never easy

Was never easy

And will never be easy

We all know that

Except for some sanctimonious jerks

Who think we are making a mountain out of a molehill

And thus make it a point

To patronise us, every waking moment of their lives

Anyway, enough of them

Recruitment, by itself, is difficult enough

But when it comes to an Investment Banking role

The difficulty level shoots up several notches

At first, you may actually enjoy the process

Of speaking to the candidates

Because, even those who say ‘No’, do it politely

And converse with you freely

As though you are a colleague of theirs

However, as the rate of rejection increases

Your confidence in turn decreases

To the point where you begin to feel

That you are wasting your time

Then, as if by a miracle

You come across a really good candidate

Who shows interest in the role

Thus, safe in the knowledge that he will share his resume the next day

You wind up for the day

Only to receive a shock

On the following day

You don’t receive the resume

And the candidate doesn’t respond to your calls

Nor does he reply to your messages

In your desperation to find a backup profile

You call up as many candidates as you can

Only to face rejection after rejection

As the pressure on you mounts

You receive a call

From the candidate who was supposed to share his resume

Turns out he has got cold feet

And wants to remain in his present company

For at least a year

And Poof! Just like that

Your hard work has gone down the drain

And you’ll have to start all over again

Welcome to the world of Investment Banking hiring

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