My latest poem on what the world of Investment Banking hiring looks like. Here is the content:
Recruitment is never easy
Was never easy
And will never be easy
We all know that
Except for some sanctimonious jerks
Who think we are making a mountain out of a molehill
And thus make it a point
To patronise us, every waking moment of their lives
Anyway, enough of them
Recruitment, by itself, is difficult enough
But when it comes to an Investment Banking role
The difficulty level shoots up several notches
At first, you may actually enjoy the process
Of speaking to the candidates
Because, even those who say ‘No’, do it politely
And converse with you freely
As though you are a colleague of theirs
However, as the rate of rejection increases
Your confidence in turn decreases
To the point where you begin to feel
That you are wasting your time
Then, as if by a miracle
You come across a really good candidate
Who shows interest in the role
Thus, safe in the knowledge that he will share his resume the next day
You wind up for the day
Only to receive a shock
On the following day
You don’t receive the resume
And the candidate doesn’t respond to your calls
Nor does he reply to your messages
In your desperation to find a backup profile
You call up as many candidates as you can
Only to face rejection after rejection
As the pressure on you mounts
You receive a call
From the candidate who was supposed to share his resume
Turns out he has got cold feet
And wants to remain in his present company
For at least a year
And Poof! Just like that
Your hard work has gone down the drain
And you’ll have to start all over again
Welcome to the world of Investment Banking hiring